The only question is, how do you get your 19 year old mind to accept the fact that you should not be wonder woman? I hate asking for help and saying I can't do this... I keep hearing that I will pay for this later but I cant get it to sink in when its not bugging me now, ya know?
Amy 19 ROBPI from MN
lol about the Irish being born with a gift, Carolyn you are too funny!
Feeling guilty
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hope16_05
- Posts: 1670
- Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2003 11:33 am
- Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: 28 years old with a right obstetrical brachial plexus injury. 5 surgeries to date with pretty decent results. Last surgery resolved years of pain in my right arm however, I am beginning my journey with overuse in my left arm
- Location: Minnesota
- Contact:
Re: Feeling guilty
Amy 28 years old ROBPI from MN
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Kath
- Posts: 3242
- Joined: Mon Nov 18, 2002 4:11 pm
- Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: I am ROBPI, global injury, Horner's Syndrome. No surgery but PT started at 2 weeks old under the direction of New York Hospital. I wore a brace 24/7 for the first 11 months of my life. I've never let my injury be used as an excuse not to do something. I've approach all things, in life, as a challenge. I approach anything new wondering if I can do it. I tried so many things I might never have tried, if I were not obpi. Being OBPI has made me strong, creative, more determined and persistent. I believe that being obpi has given me a very strong sense of humor and compassion for others.
- Location: New York
Re: Feeling guilty
Carolyn
You made me laugh... My mother always use to tell people I was born talking... LOL...
I guess it is an Irish thing.
Amy I know how hard this is for you... and to admit we can't do something is so humbling... I hate to say I can't do something.
Someone suggested that I begin to say.
" The doctors does not want me to lift any heavy objects"
" I'm sorry but bpi injured are not supposed to lift"
I found when I used the bpi injured line I was never questioned and more comfortable.
At 19 it is hard because you have had a lifetime of gaining your independence.
You probably can manage to avoid something's right now. You must set the rules when you begin your family.
You will have to have help from your partner when it comes to lifting, household chores.
You will have to buy appliances that will not impact your neck, back and spine.
My husband never let me carry heavy things.
I just never realized how heavy certain things were because I did it with my left unaffected arm.
I also gave him a hard time if I was doing something and he took it out of my hands to help.
Instead of saying thank you...
I would remind him that I was strong and could do it myself... ugh.. dummy...
Right now don't worry but be aware that there are times when you should not overdue.
You need to be able to enjoy your youth.
I think by knowing and accepting you have some limitations you can avoid some of the secondary injuries.
Now go enjoy your new year in college.
Kath (adult/robpi)
You made me laugh... My mother always use to tell people I was born talking... LOL...
I guess it is an Irish thing.
Amy I know how hard this is for you... and to admit we can't do something is so humbling... I hate to say I can't do something.
Someone suggested that I begin to say.
" The doctors does not want me to lift any heavy objects"
" I'm sorry but bpi injured are not supposed to lift"
I found when I used the bpi injured line I was never questioned and more comfortable.
At 19 it is hard because you have had a lifetime of gaining your independence.
You probably can manage to avoid something's right now. You must set the rules when you begin your family.
You will have to have help from your partner when it comes to lifting, household chores.
You will have to buy appliances that will not impact your neck, back and spine.
My husband never let me carry heavy things.
I just never realized how heavy certain things were because I did it with my left unaffected arm.
I also gave him a hard time if I was doing something and he took it out of my hands to help.
Instead of saying thank you...
I would remind him that I was strong and could do it myself... ugh.. dummy...
Right now don't worry but be aware that there are times when you should not overdue.
You need to be able to enjoy your youth.
I think by knowing and accepting you have some limitations you can avoid some of the secondary injuries.
Now go enjoy your new year in college.
Kath (adult/robpi)
Kath robpi/adult
Kathleen Mallozzi
Kathleen Mallozzi
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Carolyn J
- Posts: 3424
- Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2004 1:22 pm
- Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: LOBPI. I am 77 yrs old and never had a name for my injuries until 2004 when I found UBPN at age 66.
My injuries are: LOBPI on upper body and Cerebrael Palsy on the lower left extremities. The only intervention I've had is a tendon transplant from my left leg to my left foot to enable flexing t age 24 in 1962. Before that, my foot would freeze without notice on the side when wearing heels AND I always did wear them at work "to fit in" I also stuttered until around age 18-19...just outgrew it...no therapy for it. Also suffered from very very low self esteem; severe Depression and Anxiety attacks started at menopause. I stuffed emotions and over-compensated in every thing I did to "fit in" and be "invisible". My injuries were Never addressed or talked about until age 66. I am a late bloomer!!!!!
I welcome any and all questions about "My Journey".
There is NO SUCH THING AS A DUMB QUESTION.
Sharing helps to Heal. HUGS do too. - Location: Tacoma WA
- Contact:
Re: Feeling guilty
Amy and all "Young'uns,
HERE,HERE, Kath!!
HUGS all around,
Carolyn J
HERE,HERE, Kath!!
HUGS all around,
Carolyn J
Carolyn J
Adult LOBPI
Adult LOBPI
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kissygoose
Re: Feeling guilty
It's all well and good when you have someone to delegate to. Kath you husband sounds like a dream. Unfortunately not all of them get it. Most of the time mine resents that I "can't" be doing things. The other problem is that he's just not here so much of the time. For example I'm having a yard sale today and because of work and other commitments he can't help at all. Which means all the set up (table set up, hauling boxes and large items, etc) has to be done by me. For me there is no one else to delegate to. Add to that the "I can do it myself" complex and you have a recipe for future problems.
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kissygoose
Feeling guilty
I really need to get this off my chest. Lately I have been feeling really guilty. Sometimes I wonder if I'm using my injury as a crutch. I see so many other people out in the workforce who have injuries worse than mine but they are working. I know that my injury is considered minor by most doctors and I've often wondered if maybe I'm making more out of it than there is to it. Yes I have pain and am on meds for it but there are others out there in the same position and they work. With this SSD stuff going on too I've been wondering about it even more and feeling more guilty for trying to get SSD. I'm worried at the same time of going to this hearing and being laughed at and told I'm nuts and that I'm not that bad (I have an issue with needing people to approve of me). I've often wondered if I really do have a legitimate problem and I'm just having trouble overcoming years and years of trying to be normal or if I'm just a big phoney.
Last bumped by Anonymous on Sun Apr 20, 2014 6:52 am.